2 secret techniques to stimulate your marriage

Marriage quoteCreating a dynamic marriage is not as easy, as we all once thought, is it?

Each partner started in our own marriage relationship thinking we had “the answers” – right?

Of course we did. Then one day wham!, we discovered we needed some help, but where do we go to get it?

Here is a powerful method to invest in your marriage. It will take courage, but the benefits are tremendous!

Invest in your marriage in two distinctive methods:

First, do your homework to find one or two couples who have been married for a while and take them to a nice restaurant.

Tell them up front why you want their time. By the way, it will thrill them enormously.


Invite them to dinner for the express purpose of “picking their brains” as a couple.

Ask them some targeted questions which I have listed below for you. You might even give them some of the questions a head of time.


Let them know that you selected them especially because you respect them and want to gain some wisdom from them.

What questions can you ask them? They could include these listed below but are certainly not limited to these:

What makes a good marriage?

Why has your marriage survived and thrived?

If you were to counsel an engaged couple, soon to be married, what 3 – 4 points would you tell them about having a successful marriage?

What do you see in us that you would help us change to make our marriage better?

You get the idea, right? If you want some additional questions, email me and I will happy to generate some unique thoughts specifically tailored for you.

Secondly, after you have some of this sorted out in your own marriage, shift the responsibility around.

The second part to this equation is for you to take the part of the older / wiser couple.

Seek at least one couple who has been married fewer years than you have and pour your wisdom into them.

Whatever you have experienced, you and your husband or wife can now encourage this younger couple.

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Work as a team to develop a plan to encourage this second couples growth.

Let them know some of the positive aspects that you have observed about them so they can see your interest in them.

You could either take them to dinner or invite them to your house to share with them.


Between you and your spouse, list a few of this couple’s good attributes.

Perhaps share some of the principals you learned here within these articles and what you learned at other marriage sites you visit.

There are many terrific sites to strengthen your mutual walk.

What books are you reading about how to strengthen your marriage? Have you listened to any good CD’s or MP3’s?

Share these valuable resources with this couple.

Pour lots of good effort into their marriage and as a byproduct, you will see your marriage really blossom.

They might enjoy spending time considering some thoughtful, reflective questions like the ones listed above.

Give us your feedback as to how you arranged the meetings and how they are progressing.

This is not to pry but to share how marriages are growing in this world we live.


One couple we have worked with for more than ten years refers to us as their “parents” in a loving manner.

When they have some difficult trauma or some decision they need help sorting through they call us.

We feel very blessed to have other couples see us as positive role models. In a few years, you will have the same rich experience!

Take the time to constantly Invest in your marriage as it will reap valuable rewards.

If you have children keep in mind that you are training them no matter what you do in your marriage. So why not give them a good model to imitate?

If necessary you can make course adjustments to put your marriage back where you want it to be and a mature couple can help.

As you make course adjustments, you can help younger husbands and wives experience romance and passion for each other.

You will definitely make an impression on your children and those married couples around you.

Just what type of impression depends upon your life together as wife and husband.


Be sure to pass the post along to encourage a friend’s marriage.

Always Expect The Best For Your Marriage as The Best Is Yet To Be!!!

                              – – Your Friend — Jerry Stumpf

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Jerry is a marriage relationship expert, public speaker, author of several books, blogger, certified marriage coach and marriage mentor. Jerry & Elaine host educational, actionable, & interactive marriage seminars which equip attendees with many "tools" which captivate each other in deeper conversations. Jerry has been married forty three years to the same beautiful woman. They have three children and seven grandchildren. Their greatest passion is assisting married couples to unlock each other's heart through open transparent communication, with their gentle interactive guidance.

Posted in Communication, Marriage